Inside the Mind of a Master Procrastinator | Tim Urban | TED

Now, when a normal student writes a paper, they might spread the work out a little like this.

现在，普通学生写论文时，可能会像这样把任务分散开来。

So, you know -- (Laughter) you get started maybe a little slowly, but you get enough done in the first week that, with some heavier days later on, everything gets done, things

所以，你知道——（笑声）——你可能开始得慢一点，但第一周能完成足够的进度，这样后面几天忙一点，事情就能搞定。

stay civil平稳的.

保持平稳有序。

(Laughter) And I would want to do that like that.

（笑声）而我原本打算就那样做。

would be the plan.

那才是我的计划。

I would have it all ready to go, but then, actually, the paper would come along, and then I would kind of do this.

我本来准备就绪，可论文一来，我就变成了这样。

(Laughter) And that would happen every single paper.

（笑声）每篇论文都是如此。

But then came my 90-page senior thesis, a paper you're supposed to spend a year on.

但后来我那篇90页的毕业论文来了，那是本该花一年时间完成的论文。

And I knew for a paper like that, my normal work flow was not an option.

我知道对于这样的论文，我平时的写作流程行不通了。

It was way too big a project.

这个项目太大了。

So I planned things out, and I decided I kind of had to go something like this.

所以我重新规划，决定大概要按这种方式进行。

is how the year would go.

这就是这一年的安排。

So I'd start off light, and I'd bump it up in the middle months, and then at the end, I would kick it up into high gear just like a little staircase.

所以我先轻装上阵，中间几个月加快速度，最后再全力冲刺，就像爬楼梯一样。

How hard could it be to walk up the stairs?

走楼梯能有多难？

No big deal, right?

没什么大不了的，对吧？

But then, the funniest thing happened.

但接下来发生了件最滑稽的事。

Those first few months?

头几个月呢？

They came and went, and I couldn't quite do stuff.

它们一晃而过，我却什么都做不了。

So we had an awesome new revised修订过的 plan.

所以我们制定了一个全新的修订版计划。

(Laughter) And then -- (Laughter) But then those middle months actually went by, and I didn't really write words, and so we were here.

（笑声）然后——（笑声）——结果中间几个月也过去了，我一个字都没写，所以我们到了这一步。

And then two months turned into one month, which turned into two weeks.

两个月变成一个月，接着又变成两周。

And one day I woke up with three days until the deadline截止日期, still not having written a word, and so I did the only thing I could: I wrote 90 pages over

有一天，我醒来时离截止日期只有三天了，仍然一个字都没写，所以我唯一能做的就是：在72小时内写了90页，熬了不止一个而是两个通宵——人类不应该熬两个通宵——然后冲过校园，慢动作跳进，刚好在最后期限前交了上去。

72 hours, pulling not one but two all-nighters -- humans are not supposed to pull two all-nighters -- sprinted across campus, dove in slow motion, and got it in just at the

72小时，熬了不止一个而是两个通宵——人类不应该熬两个通宵——然后冲过校园，慢动作跳进，刚好在最后期限前交了上去。

deadline.

截止日期。

I thought that was the end of everything.

我以为那是一切终结的时刻。

But a week later I get a call, and it's the school.

但一周后我接到一个电话，是学校打来的。

And they say, "Is this Tim Urban?"

他们问：‘这是蒂姆·厄本吗？’

And I say, "Yeah."

我回答：‘是的。’

And they say, "We need to talk about your thesis论文（尤指学位论文）."

他们说：‘我们需要谈谈你的毕业论文。’